I just don’t understand men: Football, Ballet and Toilets

I’m back after a hell week of frantic music rehearsal. One week is not long enough notice to get a piece of music and perform it well. Please take note of this if you want music at your event. Please, please a month preparation time is very nice! Enough of that. I’ve reached a quandary of mass proportions on two points of male behavior. If anyone who can shed some light on these I’d really appreciate it.

First, I don’t get why straight men would want to run after other sweaty men who are running after a bit of pig skin (football), while they shun dancing with beautiful women in ballet? [Ballet, I assure you, is much harder to do and do well.] On the other hand, why would (predominantly) gay men want to dance with beautiful women instead of chasing and jumping on other sweaty men? Does this make sense to you? If the situations were reversed it would make total sense…..

Second, Do you know who invented the auto-flush toilet? I’ve done a little research on this and two men claim to have done this (independently). Now you know, men–who get to stand to do 50% of their business, don’t have to worry about this half the time, but I really hate a combination toilet/bidet. [I wish you could hear my song Super Potty Girl–the Opera) Once I get it with video and up on Youtube I’ll let you know.] How can this possibly be hygienic? I mean, you wipe, then grab the door handle…..Have we really accomplished anything here?

So we’ve got this straight now:

1) Gay men should play football

2) Straight men should dance ballet

3) Women should design toilets!

Next up: Gift giving guides

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